It is interesting that after the last blog, the next chapter in the book I'm reading is about hunger and learning to tell the difference between hunger, desire, and cravings.
Hunger is something that I very seldom feel because I am afraid to get there. Perhaps the last blog helps me to understand a little bit why that might be. But people who have dieted a lot tend to start to feel a fear of feeling hungry. Yup. I'm there.
Right now I am feeling hungry. I ate about 5 hours ago, so my body may be ready for something more. I feel a little afraid, perhaps apprehensive about going to bed hungry. Both of those words seem too strong. I'll have to think of a better one. But I do know I have started to really dislike the discomfort that comes with being hungry. The dislike has gotten stronger in the past few years. I worry, less than worry really, but something akin to it. It's more subconscious than worry. The thoughts are below the surface....If I go to bed without eating, will I sleep well? Will it keep me up? What can I eat?
I think this real fear of hunger has become worse in the last year. I wonder what has triggered it. I only know that I make sure and pack a lot of food to take to work because I am worried about being hungry while I am there. I look to feel more than satiated, full really; sometimes overly full. I know that contributes to my overeating. I need to learn that to be hungry is okay. I can handle discomfort.
For a time I went through a phase (I have been through many, many food phases) where I would stop at a gas station before work for a "steamed milk." Steamed cream is more like it. The name sounds innocuous enough, but I bet there's plenty of calories, fat, and sugar to sink the best of diet intentions. The thing is that there was a unique comfort in the full, warm feeling that it left me with. There is also a unique stupor that results from the mixture of fat and warm milk when it fills your stomach.
Now why would that be a feeling that I would want? What does that do for me? I suppose it replaces the apprehensive feeling I have about my life sometimes. Do other people worry and fret the way I do about just getting through? Maybe, maybe not. Either way, that full/comatose feeling is something I need to learn to let go of.
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I read somewhere just recently that our bodies need to be fed every four hours. So, if you ate breakfast at 7 a.m., you should have a small snack (such as a Yoplait yogurt--2 pts) at 11 a.m. Then have lunch as usual at 12 p.m. or 1 p.m. Then have a healthy snack at 3:30 or 4 p.m. such as an orange. Then dinner at 6 p.m. and maybe something small and sweet, such as a Dove Promise chocolate for dessert on weeknights (splurge only on Sundays when it comes to dessert).
ReplyDeleteAs for me, sleep is always a much more powerful draw to me, so I have never been tempted to stop and get something before going to work--I never had the time.
But when it comes to steamed milk, I like to make my own. Use skim milk and sugar free Italian syrup (coconut, almond, and hazelnut are delicious) and heat it in the microwave for 1 minute. I think the warmth is what fills you up and makes you feel satisfied more than the cream does. You don't have to lose that comforting feeling.
Because, I think one of the purposes of food IS for comfort--just not to excess. It is one of the pleasures of life, but as with all pleasures, it should be enjoyed in moderation...darn it!
I love you! You can do this!
I think you are right. The purpose of the book is to take someone like me who has totally lost sight of it and teach me that it's doable to be a little hungry once in a while. I'm telling you that you cannot believe how crazy I have gotten about it. I think it's the stress of going to work. Before B----- had her last day in December, I was stock piling food to blot out the happenings. I need to learn another way. I think I'm getting there.
ReplyDeleteI will have to get some of the sugar free flavorings. I especially like it to help me sleep. And you are right that it is the warmth that works...and the fullness. The other stuff makes you feel sluggish. Ick.
I make Laurel crazy by my eating habits. Here's a typical day for me. I can't eat breakfast first thing. I've never been good at breakfasts. Call it laziness, I hate to prepare and cook for myself. So I often stop for a few soda's and then I can work, sometimes to 2 or 3 in the afternoon without eating anything solid.
ReplyDeleteThen I come home, and raid the fridge. Cheese is my biggest craving. I am a protein a holic and fruits and vegetables are the enemy. Laurel is the opposite. She steams a variety of vegetables almost every night. She very seldom goes for the protein end. We are the a-typical Jack Sprat could eat no fat, his wife could eat no lean (only reverse that!)
Not good. Not good at all! And Laurel has been working so hard for so many years to "just stay where she's been at!"
We talk a lot about this issue. And Sarah is right... everything comes down to moderation. As Americans, we have never learned how to do this well. We live in the land of the extremes and the home of the de-praved! (Sorry, weak political humor!)
I love part of the Hobbit way of looking at things. There's breakfastess, elenvensies, brunch, afternoon tea, dinner, blah blah blah, and I think Sarah has hit upon a good concept that Laurel also shares with me... just doing a little throughout the day. (Hobbits are big eaters every time they eat, so you don't want to add that to the regime, but the periodic eating feels right!)
What is so ironic to me is that everything that tastes good and is so fun to do seems to be wrong for you! How stupid is that for a way to run a planet! But this planet is about challenge, and learning, for myself, the biggest lesson of all... balance! (And that damn moderation thing...!)
(And with an attitude like that Bruce, you will never get anywhere!)